Starwood, 'If It Ain’t Broke, Break It' -- Album Review
Friday, October 5, 2012 at 12:01AM 
Welcome to 2004!
Okay, sometimes we are all a little late to the party, and in this case it is me that fell behind. I just purchased the If It Ain’t Broke, Break It album (GREAT title) released by Starwood in 2004. For those of you that do not know, Starwood is a side project fronted by none other than Lizzy Borden. Now, I am a huge Lizzy Borden fan, as I think he has an amazing voice and the energy he (and his entire band) put into a live show is always top notch. So how could I not purchase this album. The first thing that grabs you when listening to this album is that it is not a Lizzy Borden album, which is great. Performing under a different name gave Lizzy the chance to break character and not be confined to the role he has created in his main gig. The songs do not have to be about axes and voyeurism, but instead he is free to write and sing about anything he so chooses. Overall the album is strong, and I find myself listening to it again and again. "Subculture," "What’s Your Damage" and "Social Zero" are among my favorite tracks, but taken as a whole, this is definitely a solid effort. However, there are a few things I would have liked to have changed about this album. I wish Lizzy and the band had spent a little bit more time developing the songs and the lyrics. I think with a little bit more time, the songs would have finished stronger and have made more of an impact. For example, there is a song called “All My Girlfriends Have Boyfriends” on the album. I give them credit for coming up with a clever song title that really could have been developed into something perhaps humorous and memorable. Instead, the chorus simply repeats, “All my girlfriends have boyfriends, ohh no, ohh, no” over and over again, and is ultimately forgettable. To me, this seems like a missed opportunity. Also, I wish Lizzy had looked further for the members of Starwood (most members of Starwood are also members of the Lizzy Borden band), as several of the songs actually sound like they could be Lizzy Borden songs, and I think it would have been good for him to break further away from that character and sound he has already created. While Joey Scott is a great metal drummer and is a perfect fit for the Lizzy band, I think he lacks a certain amount of "flow" in his playing for something that is more pop rock sounding, and I think Lizzy would have fared better with a more groove-oriented drummer for this project (…and yes, I know that Joey is Lizzy’s brother).
At the end of the day, I do dig the album, and would encourage any fans of Lizzy Borden to buy a copy of the Starwood release (under $10 from iTunes). Even for the shortcomings mentioned above, it is still a great, solid record.
Reader Comments (9)
Unfortunately for Lizzy, the club was 100 times more interesting than his side project ever was. That could be why it took 8 or 9 years for you to discover this. It just wasn't interesting enough to garner any word of mouth.
This is a case of a wild man who's alter ego is a complete bore. Hit seems that by attempting to do something different, Lizzy boxed himself in with parameters of what he couldn't do to keep separation from his larger than life persona.
My guess is he realized he could only take "Lizzy Borden" so far particularly after the MTV bought a flannel shirt and relocated to Seattle so he attempted Modern Rock. The whole excersize demonstrated what's wrong with most Modern Metal -- BORING!
Lizzy Borden should have realized long ago when it came to Starwood, it was time to "Give 'Em The Axe".
p.s. I saw Borden 3 times -- Twice at Network up in the 'Dena and once in a tiny Bar in Maryland in 2001. The first time I saw him at Network, I got to shake the man's blood drenched hand during the song, "Red Rum". I remember my girlfriend freaking out about it. Even one of my buddies couldn't handle it -- "I don't know about that, man.", he said, probably the exact reaction Lizzy was looking for. I'll never forget hearing "Give 'Em The Axe" and "Red Rum" for the first time on the priceless (I saw somebody wanted $80 for it recently on EBay recently) "Best of Metal Blade, Volume 1" (cassette version with bonus tracks) back in '87. That album exposed me to more sh*t like Slayer's "Reign In Terror". It also made me realize how superior Lizzy Borden is to ALL of that other sh*t! What chops that dude has and the band ever lacked in that department, either. Great songs, too! Get all their 80's output -- You can't go wrong! One of my all time favorites! "We all need American Metal!" (BTW -- For all you Modern Rockers -- Tunnel do a helluva cover of that killer song on their eponymous 2009 album)
p.s.s.t. Thanks for the great post, Bri. Though we are kinda trashing Starwood, it does shed light on one of 80's Metal's almost forgotten legends. And, Ace! Did you know Lizzy at all? He struck me as an aloof character when I saw him in Baltimore. Maybe he was acting weird cuz it was such a rude awakening to him how bad his popularity had waned so much by that time -- he didn't even pack that tiny bar which could only pack 100 people if they were lucky.
This review is a good excuse to bust it out again though, been awhile.
$80 for the cassette version of Metal Massacre #1?
Wow, I GAVE AWAY my vinyl 1st pressing,(the one w/ the original, non-Yngwie Steeler track, instead of Black n' Blue) to a kid that was taking guitar lessons at the Rhoads family's Musonia Music about 2 years ago. He was such a Metallica fan, so I gave him their 1st appearance on vinyl. ("Hit The Lights" was the song.) I'm really surprised these have gotten so pricey.
As for Lizzy, I met him a couple of times, he was more from the outer San Fernando Valley Canoga Park/Reseda "Country Club" scene than the Hollywood Sunset Strip scene. I didn't really mean to trash Starwood, it's just that much like the LP, the band never really seemed to generate much excitement, or interest. I had heard of LB's "Diamond Dogs" project, I just never saw them play live.
I have to quibble on two points though: Slayer's work, especially up through _South of Heaven_ is solid and can withstand a comparison to Lizzy (the band). And Lombardo is a beast on drums. Seen him several times and he always impresses. No offense to Joey Scott, of course. But you get my point. I also have to put in a good word for Omen. Horribly under-rated, especially when you consider how good _Warning of Danger_ was (with the first and third albums being just about as good). The reason? Singer J. D. Kimball. Not operatic or theatrical like Lizzy (the singer). But, man, that guy's voice was so unique. A perfect fit for the power metal he was singing. And a crying shame that he never did anything else of note after he left the band and before he died in 2003.
I've only met Lizzy once. He seemed uncomfortable around so many (by which I mean approx. 100) fans. But he was gracious, spent time signing things and taking pictures, and put on a great show. I've always wondered if the very traits that make him so loved by fans--the theatrics, the voice, the stage show--also limited his growth commercially. You compare him to a guy like Lawless, and you sort of have to shrug. Perhaps it was an issue of promotion. I really don't know.
Look I saw these guys whenever the h*ll "Reign In Blood" came out. Oddly enough, they were opening for The Ramones and were completely laughable. Proof that a great lead guitarist does not a band make.
p.s. Yeah, that "Best of Metal Blade, Volume 1" is a KILLER. The bonus tracks are killarious, especially "Look of Death" by Pandemonium and "Posers Will Die" by Thrust. Those guys are but footnotes in Metal History, they make Slayer seem like their shoe shine boys.
And Omen? What about Omen?